Funny Whatsapp Status and Facebook Funny Comments

Funny Whatsapp Status

• I’m not failed…my success is just postponed for some time.
• When nothing seems right….go left!!
• Sorry about those texts I sent you last night, my phone was drunk.
• Love thy neighbor. But don’t get caught.
• If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.
• A woman is like a tea bag, you cannot tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water.
• Don’t drink and park – accidents cause people.
• When a bird hits your window have you ever wondered if God is playing angry birds with you?
• Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.
• A BOSS is like a diaper... Always on your ass, and usually full of Shi***t
• Ever read a book that changed your life? Me neither.
• Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water. After you get used to it, it ain’t so hot.
• When a girl says she’ll be ready in 5 more minutes, it’s the same as when a guy says the game has 5 minutes left. :D
• I come up with the best ideas when sitting on the toilet then forget them after the flush.
• Hey Mate…you There…Whatsapp is using me. :D
• Etc= End of thinking Capacity.
• Only Marriage is the major cause of divorce.
• If you are player then I’m the GAME.
• Awesome ends with ME and Ugly starts with you.
• You can disturb me….I’m available. :D
• Some people call me Mike, You can call me tonight.
• Scratch here ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ to reveal this status.
• Do You Want To Go Out With Me? (A) Yes (B) A (C) B.
• Every problem comes with a solution. If it doesn’t have any solution, it’s a…………. Girl :)
• Insult and wife are somewhat similar....They always look good...If it is not yours
• I'm Jealous of My Parents... I'll Never Have a Kid as Cool as Theirs!
• I speak my mind. I never mind what I speak.
• Love your girl like you love your Coffee… Enjoy it before its hotness goes.
• ☺  Behind this smile is everything you’ll never understand.
• We all feel a little f**d up sometimes.
• If I’m wired with you. I like you.
• I love buying new things but I hate spending money.
• Stop waiting for one Day. Today is the Day- Bang-Bang
• I hate math but I love counting money.
• I believe in hate at first sight.
• There’s always a person that you hate for no reason.
• If I get jealous then yes I really like you.
• The Earth without Art is just Eh.
• We all are born to die don’t feel more special than me.
• I’m not arguing, I’m simply tried to explaining why I’m Right.
• Laziness is me middle name.
• I wonder if I've met the person I’m going to marry.
• Math Rule: If it seems easy, you’re doing it wrong.
• I need Google in my brain.
• You have eyes my dear but you cannot see.
• I’m not weird, I’m limited edition.
• The problem is not the problem; the problem is your attitude about the problem.
• If you fall. I’ll be there.
• Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night?