April 11, 2016
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Everything sucks...............................................except FOOD !!!! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Accomplishing things before the microwave hits 00:00.

Just finished my 6 minute upper body workout-it was pretty easy:arm down,pick up food,arm up,put food in mouth, switch arms :)
really doesn`t get why people like brunch. What`s the benefit of combining break-dancing and lunch?

Okay, can someone please invent the opposite of a microwave. I need my beer cold, now. And no, the freezer is not fast enough :)

When I hear myself eating crunchy food, I wonder if other people can hear it too.

There was a piece of chocolate cake in the fridge and a note, “Don’t eat me.” Now there’s an empty plate and a note, Don’t tell me what to do.

"ughh I`m so full".."who wants dessert?".."MEEE!!!"

I`m not hungry. But, I am bored. Therefore, I shall eat. Story of every person`s life.
When you`re stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate, and sweets.. Why? Because `Stressed` spelled backwards is `Desserts` :) 

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